proud owner of a 15 day luteal phase?
Posted: November 8, 2006 Filed under: Uncategorized 11 Comments »Still no period. Last month, my first complete cycle after the sucking (in so many ways) dead baby, I had a 15 day luteal phase. I didn’t think that meant I would ALWAYS have a 15 day luteal phase but… today is 15dpo and there’s no sign of it. Charlotte says that of all the fertility myths, the longer cycle=better fertility seems like it may be the most likely to be true. Ech. Maybe. It doesn’t much matter whether my fertility was improved by my brief pregnancy, since I will still be doing the exact same protocol that worked before – 25mg Clomid cd5-9, ultrasounds starting 10dpo, eventual Ovidrel trigger shot, Ovidrel booster shot at 6dpo. Easy as pie. Added benefit of hot flashes and it being cooler temperatures now (Wes is looking forward to the day when I will stop pumping the heat so high).
I am still in considerable pain today but not as bad as yesterday. It has been raining nonstop and that doesn’t help anything. It’s a rather crap day all around – a kid I had previously tamed was a total brat during my lunch duty, an idea for dealing with the scheduling committee work doesn’t seem to be panning out and I am at a loss as to what to do at our meeting after school today, and Shadow Pregnancy is here and getting huger by the minute. And my assistant is crabby because of an overwhelming paper cutting project assigned to her by Shadow Pregnancy so no one is happy around here.
I think I am sinking into just the eensiest bit of post-convention depression. It was something to look forward to. I expected that it would time out perfectly to sweep me into the next cycle. I know we are only talking about a couple of days difference, but those of you who have spent the last couple of years waiting for your body to do things KNOW what a difference those days make. I am supposed to be glad that my luteal phase is longer. Maybe the myths are true – I did get pregnant on my 3rd cycle after an HSG, so maybe such ideas hold some truth. But then, my neighbor swore that all babies conceived on Clomid are girls (or an overwhelming majority, anyway) and she was wrong about mine. I don’t know. I just know I am sick of waiting.
I have very little to say today. It’s really hard to be witty when in pain.
I may quit NaNo because I haven’t started yet and feel like hell and I don’t know if/when I will feel better and be able to start pumping out 2272 words a day for the next 22 days. It sounds ludicrous to think that I could do that. I’m not sure I have enough self-control or discipline to even make the attempt this year. I feel dumb for agreeing to do it when I suspected that I might not be ready to hold myself to something. If it hadn’t been for GMB’s birthday and the big convention, I might have been just fine and really proud of myself for doing it. But since I knew those things were happening the first weekend of the month, I should have been wise enough not to be pressured into saying I would do it just because everyone else was. I am a pathetic follower who can’t stand for others to succeed while I am deep in the pit and not succeeding at anything more than eating chocolate and checking email. Bleh. Would some of my fellow NaNoers tell me I am not a terrible failure of a person if it doesn’t happen?
“a kid I had previously tamed was a total brat during my lunch duty”
- I say that same thing every week, only the kid is Picchi and Pacchi.
I’m sorry you’re in so much pain (physical and otherwise). It *is* a let-down when something, the one thing, you’ve been looking forward to is over. I hope we can get together soon, though. The plague seems to have lifted from here today (knock on wood).
As far as NaNo goes, Uomo said something to me last night about an undone project that I’m really disappointed in myself for not doing. He said you can always renegotiate with yourself. I think it means that just because you said you’d do something now does not mean it has to be right now. It can be done another time, especially when other priorities or goals presently have to come first (um, how about taking care of yourself? relaxing? ttc-ing? taking trips? seeing friends whom you haven’t seen for a while (wink wink)?). You can do it again another year and be fantabulous at it. Give yourself a break, tootsie pie. Besides, you already *know* you can do it because you’ve done it before. You already rock.
Well, as one who has just made the decision to quit NaNo, perhaps I’m not the type of person you’re looking for. But the way I look at it is this: there will be another November. In the event that this NaNo doesn’t happen, you can always look ahead to next year’s. And with any luck, you will have TONS of subject matter about which to write.
aww poo to nanowrimo I registered and never even pu the icon up because i knew there was a good chance i wouldn’t start it.
an i’ll tell the bitch to leave here and visit you ASAP. I’m a crampy moody mess.
nano schmano. why should you have to do it if you don’t feel like it? laG is right, you already know you can.
I couldn’t actually bring myself to talk about my hoo-ha at Blogapalooza, but..uhm, yeah. I was supposed to get my period on Saturday. I thought it would be fitting, and profound if I started bleeding right there in Shelli’s basement, surrounded by “all of you.”
Today is CD39. I’m slightly bummed.
I agree with the others. Nano is totally optional. Dump it, I say! Speaking of, I need to get back to work on mine, or all my catching up on word count yesterday will be for naught.
Lo likes to remind me of something all time, so I will say the same to you… “You are not a machine.” If you have too much other stuff to deal with and you don’t have time or energy or whatever is needed to crank out pages like a machine, then you can and should drop Nanowrimo. You’re only human… like the rest of us.
I totally hope that this 15-day luteal phase thing means heightened fertility. Between that and using the same protocol, my fingers are way crossed for you already.
you are not terrible if you quit I am finding that my life has become quite busy since I decided to do Nano and I haven’t written in 3 days so you don’t need the extra stress Bri… relax. I may quit also. Which is depressing but I keep getting sabotaged when I sit down to write and that is making me very angry!!!!
WHy not save the thouroughly depressing subject of your mom’s death and your crazy family for another year? Enjoy the holidays. Eat some fake turkey with Wes.
I hear you though. I hate not following through on something like this. I deal with that by not even signing up for anything anymore.
Here’s to getting your period so that everything is better.
I am breaking up with Nano as well. Just now decided. Maybe I will come back to it for a new year’s thing.
Hope Sophia’s vibe made it on the subway is now on its way to Brooklyn.
Maybe the four of us (you, me, Cali, Brooke) should do our own Nano in January… because, yeah, the convention and then this damn plague has totally fucked up my writing plans. I’m SO FAR BEHIND. And I HATE HATE HATE being behind. Maybe I should focus on writing some poems instead and do this whole novel thing later… We can make our own shiny blog button for the NaNo slackers…